Advice from a Stranger

Does anyone else dread going to the DMV as much as I do? The place is only open 9 to 5, Monday through Friday so if you also work that schedule (or go to school full time) you are forced to sacrifice your lunch break to wait in line only to realize that your going to spend way more than an hour there AND go lunch-less. Not to mention it's closed for all major holidays and, I'm pretty sure, all the not so major holidays and probably even a few made up holidays. So chances are, if you finally have the day off to take care of things, so do they. And on top of all those holidays the employees still manage to maintain a bad attitude and have perfected the art of talking to you as though you have the IQ of a goldfish. And don't even get me started on all the people there, because I swear I always end up next to the person that hasn't showered in a year. However, for tuition purposes at school I had no choice but to brave the DMV and get my CA driver license.

I made an appointment with the DMV about a month in advance in order to cut my waiting time (and misery) in half. When I got there the line was already out the door and there wasn't a parking spot to be found. I literally drove around the parking lot for about 20 minutes, all the while cursing whoever decided that 6 rows of parking was enough for a place that most of Orange County had to visit at one point or another. Upon parking I realized that I didn't have my ipod AND I had left my phone on the charger at home. Awesome. Zero entertainment for me. And since it took me so long to park I had missed my appointment time. So I marched in and found the line for people with appointments, hoping they wouldn't care, and stood sulking. Little did I know that I got there at just the perfect time to stand behind the sweet old man that changed my whole day.

I hadn't been standing in line very long when he turned to me and said, "You know, if it were any place but here I would let you go ahead of me". I kind of smiled and said, "Oh, no I don't blame you! You have to wait in line long enough as it is. But thank you!" Then he said, "It's really not so bad if you have someone to talk to." And with that we started our little friendship. He was number 76 and I was number 77, we had a while to wait until either of our numbers were called. While we sat in the waiting area he told me that he came to New York when he was 16 from Holland. He spoke French, German and Dutch then, but not English. He learned English by taking a French class in high school and tutoring the other kids. While they picked up french, he picked up English. He told me about living through the Great Depression, and how he fought in World War II. He told me about his degree in Bacteriology, and that he moved to CA to work in a hospital because there weren't enough Bacteriologists to go around. He told me he would have rather been married, but didn't mind working so much since he was single. He did get married later on in life, but they didn't have children. They travelled the world together, until 2 years ago when his love passed away. His favorite place to travel to was Austria. I've been to Austria so we talked about it's beauty. We talked about John Wayne, and old movies I need to see. And we talked about me. We discussed what I'm studying in school, what I want to do with my life, where I'm from, how long I've been married etc. Then he gave me life and marriage advice. This is one of my favorites:

HIM: "You know, there are two things you'll never learn in school no matter how long you study for. One is how to live with a woman...or vice versa. And the other is how to die."
ME: "Well then, what's the secret?"
HIM: "Say what you mean. And mean what you say." As for the dying part, well I haven't quite figured that out yet either.

He continued with advice and stories until his number was called, then he smiled and winked at me and said, "See ya tomorrow, kid." I've been trying to say what I mean, and mean what I say more. That was just what I needed to hear that day.

After he left, I sat thinking about how grateful I was that I left my ipod at home that day. All too often we plug into our ipods or cell phones and miss out on the people around us that could turn out to be a new friend or some good advice. This dear old man, whose name I unfortunately never learned, taught me so much more than I ever expected to learn at the DMV. He reminded me of how contagious kindness is. He made my day better and I realized that I can be that person for someone else. Next time you find yourself alone in a room full of people strike up a conversation! Everyone has a story to tell and you might be amazed at the things people will share, and what you'll learn.